El Paso – Next to Phalic Tower - Senator Shapleigh and his supporters are claiming victory after ASARCO announced that will not reopen.
“I worked very hard to get them to shut their doors” Shapleigh said at a press conference held just north of the property over looking an open air sewage treatment plant. “I had to personally crash the entire world economy in order to drive down the price of copper so low that they’d decided to close for goog.” he added.
The TCEQ did not cooperate with Shapleigh and his band of followers when they asked the State of Texas to declare ASARCO and its then employees the perpetrators and executors of the holocaust and 9/11 and therefore should be shutdown last year.
Asked whether it was worth single-handedly ruining the economy to shutdown ASARCO, Shapleigh answered, “fuck yes! you mess with the bull you’re going to get humped like an intern in an Austin lobby office.”
President Obama thanked Senator Shapleigh and his supporters for their commitment ot improving the view for Kern residents.
